If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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