I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
