stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
