I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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