For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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