nut hugger
I looked at my own cervix.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize