just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
