i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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