best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
