I need help removing her.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
