ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
