he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
