I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
