I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
We named our party play list daddy issues
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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