i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
