the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Found your dick twin last night
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
