i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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