Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
