I murdered the dance floor call the cops
He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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