Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
