the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
