No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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