so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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