I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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