some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
