Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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