I love black thongs
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
