I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
