Where are you?
In a non slutty way
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize