Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
