We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Even my vagina gasped.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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