my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
