My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
