Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize