I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I have peed in a lot of sinks
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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