Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
