Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
