Jerry, you need to find god
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
