I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
