Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
