someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
