hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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