just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
