I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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