Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
