Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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