is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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