We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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