Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize