trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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