What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
