Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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