My brain says no but my pants say off.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
