Your tits are I can't wait for
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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