tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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